Meet my guest today, A. M. Hounchell, who writes weird (I mean this is the best possible way) and funny stuff.

I’m just a small-town boy living in a lonely world. I grew up in a Kansan town of 300. I graduated in a class with 62 people. I was raised by my grandparents, who took me in at a young age. Now I live with my wife, Grace, and our two cats, Kiwi and Swarley.

 

Interview

1. Tell us a little about yourself?

 

I have exactly all my toes. That seems like a little bit about me.

2. What made you want to become a writer?

If I were to try to trace it back to when I first picked up a pen, I’d say my lack of friends. My lack friends when I was in kindergarten forced me to write my own friends and create my own rules. Then it just evolved from there. Until one day, I made friends because of my desire to create worlds.

3. Titles have always been extremely difficult for me. How do you come up with yours?

I ask myself, “Is this pun or play on words?” If the answer is no, I continue searching for a different title. Though the titles come first sometimes. It’s like they come to me wanting to adopt a plot. Like the title Psychobotomy. Still don’t know what I’m doing with that.

4. Do you have a day job in addition to being a writer?  If so, what do you do during the day?

Somehow, I have a job in sales. I sell diamonds in the day and write diamonds in the rough at night. I don’t know how it happened either, so asking me is futile.

5. Tell us a little about your plans for the future.  Do you have any other books in the works?

I have 28 different ideas at different stages of completion. While I am writing those ideas, I’m planning on searching for a traditional publisher. But one of my main goals is to finish a single trilogy.

6. If you could shift into any animal, which would you chose? Why? If you were going to be permanently changed into an animal? Would you still pick the same one? Why or why not?

Komodo dragon because they are going extinct. They are also cool lizards with the word dragon in their name. Their saliva is basically stomach acid. That would make me an acid spitting island dragon! Doesn’t that sound awesome!

I wouldn’t want to be a Komodo dragon forever. A lizard is a creature to be for a day rather than forever. Plus, I would never last in the sun; I have that pale vampire skin that wouldn’t translate into a predator. All the other dragons would just call me ghost and hurt my feelings. I don’t want to be a mopey dragon.

7.  You’re in a tavern, and a dwarf challenges you to a duel. What do you do? What you do the same thing if the challenger were an ogre? Why or why not?

See the thing is, dwarves are very smart, so I would probably apologize and offer to buy him a drink in hopes of extending peace. On top of that, dwarves can live quite a bit longer than humans, which means he could potentially terrorize me for a long period.

As for the ogre, they aren’t very smart; they don’t live as long and are basically just the Hulk in a loin cloth. In that case, a drink might take too long for his tiny brain, so I’d offer a different challenge. I’d have to choose one that I could outsmart him in, and I’d hope for the best.

In either case, I would probably die. That seems to be the same thing.

Where can we find you online?

Blog: prosefessor.blogspot.com

Twitter: @inferno4dante

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/AM-Hounchell/e/B01LAHL546

Arrow to the Heart

Josh is a failure at most things. When he tries to take his own life from atop an overpass, he accidentally kills Cupid, God of Love. Now, he must take up Cupid’s bow and try to spread love through the world.

But when the light pink bow starts to turn a dark purple, Josh realizes that he has no love in his heart. Once Fate, War, and Death try to take over the world, Josh can’t dispel them with the bow’s love, but he can dispel them with the bow’s sharp arrows.

If Josh wants to keep the world safe from War and Death and an oncoming hell storm, then he’ll have to fight them with vengeance as opposed to love. He will have to continue to suffer, so everyone can live.

Excerpt

“How did you hit me?” The man said at first, but when he looked up at the overpass, his voice changed. “Were you trying to kill yourself?” The winged man asked. He stooped over to grab his bow, but let out a yelp as blood sprayed from his broken wing. The man couldn’t bend over far enough to grab the bow, but that was the least of his problems. For some reason, he kept peering into the darkness on both sides of the street.

“I tried. I failed like always,” Josh said calmly. His anger dissipated from seeing that the angel was hurt worse than he was. How could the divine even become injured?

“Wouldn’t that be more like succeeding to live?” The man said with a stifled laugh. “There is always a reason to live, even if it isn’t as apparent as you’d like it to be. Your body will find any way to continue.”

In a daze, Josh turned to a bright light, and he heard the distinct sound of thunder. Maybe that was his light at the end of the tunnel. “Is this your solution?” The angel screamed, but not at Josh.

Josh laughed. “Thank you,” he said, holding his hands up to the sky. Just before the light was absorbed into him, the angel pushed him out of the way at the last minute. Josh landed on his face. The angel exploded like a water balloon filled with blood. It got in his eyes and blurred his vision with a tint of red, and it tasted salty on his lips. There were fragmented body parts strewn about, but the bow was the only intact piece of the angel, and it was still laying on the opposite side of the road.

Josh bent down to pick up a broken arrow. He still couldn’t believe what was happening or if it was really happening. It was like he was a puppet. “What was that guy?” Josh asked himself. As if to answer, a shiver ran up Josh’s spine. A shimmering reflective pool opened in mid air and a strangely garbed person stepped through the pool.

He was wrapped in a leather coat with a hood drawn over his head. “That was Cupid.” He kicked a partial piece of hand and snickered. “To think, I’ve been trying to kill this bastard for hundreds of years, and he dies saving your pathetic life. I mean, what is with the power of love and sacrifice? By saving your life, he is only endangering everyone else. He should’ve known that.”

Use the comments to let us know what you think. If you’re intrigued, you can find the novel here: